Seeking

Weekly weigh-in

It looks like it's been awhile since I've posted, actually I wrote the other day but I deleted it because it was whiny. Anyway, this week has been a bit more challenging because I haven't been feeling at my optimal best. I'm at that lovely peri-menopause age/stage and the effects are manifesting in my mind and body. Heart palpitations, headaches, anxiety and my favorite, bloating. Plus it's PMS time. UGH. I guess you could call this whining too but actually it's more of a disclaimer...or...okay...an excuse. All right, I'll get to it. I gained (boo hoo) two pounds. This is why I always give up. I get on a roll and then PMS comes around and makes me eat chocolate (yes the PMS twists my arms) and bloat and gain weight! 

This time will be different though because I have my blog and you. My positive, rational brain tells me this is temporary water weight and no reason to give up. Keep on eating healthy foods and drink lots of water to wash out the bloat (even though to me it seems like it would make me bloat more). This is not a diet. I am going to eat as healthy as I can most of the time to be a healthier and hopefully, a fitter, thinner person. 

What do you do when PMS twists your arms and makes you eat pizza, chips or chocolate?

Five Down

Did you think I forgot to weigh-in on Friday? I did get on the scale but never got a chance to post!! So here is the good news...I lost 4 pounds!!! Happy dance!! Happy dance!!! When the scale shows a loss it is so motivating, exciting and freaking awesome!! For me it makes me want to eat right and exercise even more. Unfortunately though, the feeling fades and I fall into the ice cream and pizza pit. But so far not yet. Yeah, it's only been one day but that's how I've got to do this, one day at a time, like they do in the twelve steps for AA. Food is my addiction. 


Went and bought some healthy foods today, especially snacks since that's been my biggest hurdle so far. One of my blog's readers recommended to me that I get some 90 calorie granola bars and Weight Watchers ice cream. (Thank you C!!) Target had some great 100-calorie snack pack of mixed nuts and some raspberry chocolate granola bars. Plus some Weight Watchers chocolate ice cream bars. 

Tonight, my daughter and her friend made spaghetti and sauce. I made a spaghetti squash that was delicious and so light. I avoid pasta and other white flour foods because I may have a gluten sensitivity. Sometimes I eat it but then I break out in a rash. Thank God it goes away quickly though... most of the time. A lot of women as they enter their 40s and 50s experience some form of gluten and dairy sensitivities so take note if you notice skin rashes, bloating or fatigue after eating.

Five pounds down since I started this blog. I like having to report to someone-or some place. Even if only a few people read this, it helps me to share and I hope it helps someone else. 


Five pounds-95 to go!! 


What keeps you motivated?

Soul Snacks

Okay last night I gave in to a cookie. Well, Two cookies. And you know the damnedest thing? I didn't even enjoy them!! So this morning I woke up feeling gross, guilty and...motivated. Since I slept in a little late,  I got up rearing to go, put on my sweats and ran to the treadmill and walked for 20 minutes, biked for 10 and did weight training and floor exercises for another 20!! If I had all day I would exercise more. I do like it. I really do!!

Had to work again tonight and realized that I do like something to snack on when I get home. A cup of tea doesn't cut it. Usually I'm looking for something sweet, a comfort food like cookies or cake or ice cream. What are good substitutes for those? I know it's best not to eat after 8 p.m. and will work towards that goal but after work, tired, yet, an insomniac, food feeds my heart, soul and tummy and eases me into a comfortable space.

I would love to know what your favorite night time snacks are that feed your soul and tummy but without a lot of calories.

Tired and Tempted

I just got home from a 13-hour day at work and all I want to do is ease into my jammies, melt into the couch and have tea and cookies. Way too tired for a late treadmill walk and my brain has not shut off enough for me to get to sleep anytime soon. I dvred American Idol and while I watch I want to enjoy a cup of tea and dunk some nice sugar cookies into it since my sister visited today and left some in my cabinet. I wish someone was reading this right now and could talk me out of it. Going to make the tea...

Ok I have my tea, I'm sitting here writing my blog trying to avoid the sugar coated temptation. The cookies are on the counter calling my name. I can't resist. I am weak. One cookie. Just one.

A message I try to remember and practice daily

A Secret Scrolls message from Rhonda Byrne
Creator of The Secret

From The Secret Daily Teachings Begin your day by feeling grateful. Be grateful for the bed you just slept in, the roof over your head, the carpet or floor under your feet, the running water, the soap, your shower, your toothbrush, your clothes, your shoes, the refrigerator that keeps your food cold, the car that you drive, your job, your friends. Be grateful for the stores that make it so easy to buy the things you need, the restaurants, the utilities, services, and electrical appliances that make your life effortless. Be grateful for the magazines and the books that you read. Be grateful for the chair that you sit on, and the pavement that you walk on. Be grateful for the weather, the sun, the sky, the birds, the trees, the grass, the rain, and the flowers.
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
May the joy be with you,

Rhonda Byrne
The Secret... bringing joy to billions

Why can't I stop?

So...just got home from a great night out socializing having a good time with good friends. Friends, fun and food. What's better than that? There was so much delicious homemade food and I couldn't stop eating. Why can't I have one piece of something? Why do I have to eat seconds? The whole time I'm sitting there picking on the appetizers and taking bite after bite when my stomach felt full. It continued with multiple servings of mac and cheese, potato salad and sweet and sour meatballs. I swear I could feel the fat growing in my cells with each bite. But it didn't stop there, I had to have two carrot cake cupcakes, several chocolate chip bars and two small chocolate martinis. WHY? WHY? WHY? Am I a glutton for punishment or just a glutton?

I ate only one meal today because of these plans and we always have a smorgasboard of delish food. This after-gathering guilt is a regular occurrence. I purposely wore sweat pants because usually my pants start to cut in on my waist and make it painful so in a way I sabotaged myself because I knew I was going to let myself eat aimlessly and foolishly.  I'm an intelligent person. I know eating like this will cause weight gain and girth guilt but I do it anyway. What is the block? Why don't I have self-control, willpower or a conscience? Will I ever learn not to overeat, especially at parties, events and restaurants? Once I figure out the block maybe I can learn.


Do you have willpower or self-control with food? Or was it something you learned? I'd love advice or ideas!